F.B JOKES AND QUOTES2

Kung ang trabaho ko lang ay ang kakaisip sa iyo....

siguro mayaman naq sa kakaovertime no..................


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Kung magiging subject lang ako... gust ko ako ang pinakamahirap para kahit ano ang gawin mo... sa akin ka pa rin babagsak...



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kung sumasabog lang ang puso ko.....

matagal na sigurong nakakalat ang mga letra ng pangalan mo...


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normal naman akong tao....

pero pag naiisip kita....

nababliw ako............



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alam mo hindi lahat ng buhay ay buhay talaga.
katulad ko, buhay ako pero patay na patay sa iyoooooooooooooooooo


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Ibuburol kaya nila aq pag nalaman nilang patay na patay aq sau?

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“ ulan ka man at lupa aq,magtago ka man sa ulap, alam q, sa akin pa rin ang bagsak mo..”

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A Foreigner and a Filipino meet in a Fruit Stand:
The Filipino is eating an APPLE and the Foreigner is eating a BANANA.

Foreigner: You know man, in our country, APPLE is a poor man's fruit..(Smiling sarcastically)...

Filipino: Oh! Really huh! You know, here in the Philippines, only MONKEYS eat BANANAS!!!!!

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May mga tao talagang gagawa at gagawa ng paraan para masira ang buhay mo pero ang magandang parte nito, hindi ka nagpapatalo. Hindi ka nagpapatibag at marunong ka nang lumaban. Mula sa mga karanasan mong hindi mapapatawan, nakakaya mong makipaglaro sa kalaban at sa huli’y magwagi sa larong inaakala niyang siya ang mananalo.

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Minsan, hindi natin maiwasang ikumpara ang ating mga sarili sa isang tao. Hindi dahil insecure tayo, kundi para malaman lang natin kung bakit siya ang mas pinili ng taong mahal natin.

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Lahat tayo may karapatang MAGSALITA , pero lahat tayo walang karapatang MANIRA.



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PINOY PICK UP LINE 2

Boy: Naghahanap ka ba ng trabaho?

Girl: Bakit?

Boy:HIRING kasi ang puso ko ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
aw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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alam mo para kang ligaw na bala,

hindi ka sa akin nakalaan

pero ako ang tinamaan.



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Boy: miss, tatlo ka ba???:

girl: hinde ah.. ano ka duling???

boy:eh kasi andito ka sa harap ko, nandito ka rin sa puso ko, taz meron pang isa sa isipan ko ehhhhhhhhhh

awwwwwwwwwwwwwww

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boy: anong date ngaun?

girl: ah, 12. bakit?

boy: malapit na pala EX MONTHSARY natin no?

girl: oo.

boy: pwede exchange gifts tayo?

girl: cge. ano maganda iregalo??

boy: hmmm. pwede akin ka nalang ulit at sayo nalang ako???

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GIRL: napakarami mong babae! Sabihin mo nga sa akin sino ba talaga ang laman ng puso mo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????

BOY: Malay ko sa'yo!! ikaw ang may-ari nito, ako ang tinatanong mo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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girl: TUBIG BA ANG PAG-IBIG mo???

boy: bakit mo nasabi???

girl: kasi... you keep me drowning in your love eh....

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boy: CAMERA FILM ka bah??

girl: huh???bakit???

boy: gusto ko sanan madevelop ka eh..

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boy: miss music ka ba?

girl: huh?bakit?????

boy: eh kasi napaindak ang puso ko nang makita kita......

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girl: willie revillame ka ba?

boy:huh???bakit pala???

girl:eh kasi,sabi ng puso ko “ IKAW NA NGA” eh!!!

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girl:aanhin mO yang hagdan??

boy:aakyat sana aq ng ligaw sau..

girl:di na kelangan.yumuko ka nlang..

boy:ha???bakit??

girl:pulutin mo nalang ang puso ko..nhulog na kasi sa iyo...

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boy: miss kape kba???

girl: bakit?

boy: kasi nini-nerbiyos aq pag malapit kna.

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boy: alam m0,para kang SUN...

girl:haha!!naman!!di nga???

boy: oo.coz u brighten up my day...

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boy: sana wristwatch nlang kita.

girl: owwwss.?????bkt daw????

boy: para minu-minuto kitang matingnan...

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boy》tapos m0 nbang sagutin ang exam m0?

girl:oo.bakit??

boy:para aq nman ang sasagutin m0..

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Girl: Hoy! Apoy ka noh???!!!
Boy: Loko! kita mong tao....
Girl: ehe, kasi pinainit mo ko...

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Girl: Clown ka ba?

Boy: Mukha ba? Hinde eh. Bakit?

Girl: Eh kasi.... you made me smile and happy..

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BOY: alam mo kung gagagwa ako ng planeta gusto ko ikaw ang magiging orbit nito...

GIRL: Huh???? bakit naman???

BOY: Kasi gusto kong sayo lang iikot ang mundo ko...

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Boy: Kumusta kna?

Girl: Ok lang. Bakit?

Boy: Kasi para ka nang bumibilog eh..

Girl:huh?bat naman. Bad ka!

Boy: eh kasi your starting to become my world..

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Boy: Miss DRUGS ka bah? Kasi adik na ako sayo eh...

Girl: Kaw nga eh para kang MIGHTY BOND, napapdikit ako sa'yo...

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Boy: Gusto kong maging henyo sa mga formula paglaki ko..

Girl:Huh?Mahirap kaya yun..Bakit naman????

Boy: Kasi gusto kong alamin kung asnong Formula ang gagamitin para MAINLAB ka sa akin...

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Boy: Sa paglaki ko gusto ko maging Presidente ng Bansa...

Girl: Bakit? Political-minded ka pala ha..

Boy: OO gusto kasi kitang maging First Lady ng Bansa at ng PUSO ko...

Girl: Ngee...

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FACEBOOK ENGLISH QUOTES

‎*A jealous girlfriend is a faithful girlfriend. If she doesnt get jealous when someone has your attention, it's because someone else has hers.


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I think the most beautiful people are the ones who went through the toughest situations in life but still somehow manage to keep a smile on their face, having a bright personality that goes along with the smile. ♥


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‎*If there is tomorrow when we’re not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart.. I’ll always be with you.


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‎*Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.


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‎*Ladies, don't let loneliness drive you back into the arms of someone you know doesn't care about you.

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‎*when people show you their true colors , do yourself a favor and don't try to repaint the picture ♥

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‎*A relationship with no trust is like a car with no gasoline. You can stay in it all you want but it won't go anywhere.

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‎*Never give up on something you really want. It’s difficult to wait, but more difficult to regret.

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‎*When I do something great, no one ever seems to remember but when I do something wrong, no one can ever seem to forget.

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‎*One day, you're gonna miss my text messages I give you. You're going to miss how I used to worry about you when you're out too late. One day, when I'm gone, you're going to miss how you actually had someone that actually wanted you. And when I'm not there anymore, You're going to miss me.

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‎*Life can't promise pure happiness, but everything would be better if you learn to accept the things you can't change ~

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‎*She knew she had to be cautious, when speaking to him again, for she had her heart on the line. And with simply one wrong move, she could surely find herself falling for that boy all over again♥

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*Sometimes we maintain Silence to protect a beautiful relation,
but we forget that too much silence creates a distance in every beautiful relation..




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‎*Forget your insecurities and hate. Be that beautiful butterfly all the time. Nothing is impossible. Everyone has their own beauty and talent. It's all up to you on how you handle it.




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‎*Over-thinking ruins you. Ruins the situation, twists things around, makes you worry and just makes everything much worse than it actually is.



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‎*Remember when someone walks away from you, it's not the end of YOUR story, it's the end of THEIR part in your story.




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‎*Love is possible after friendship but friendship is not possible after love , because medicine works before death, after death nothing is cured.



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*Even if you live your life as an open book, people will still wonder which pages you have secret messages.



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Dream what you want to dream, go where you want to go,
be what you want to be. Because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.




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‎*Success is not about winning the game, it's about giving your best and accepting the outcome and knowing that you did your best :)

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“Love is like a Rubix Cube, there are countless numbers of wrong twists and turns, but when you get it right, it looks perfect no matter what way you look at it”

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‎*A beautiful face and great body will
never substitute for an ugly attitude and
a hateful heart. 

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‎*Do you know why a previous relationship is called EX? It`s not the term for the past. EX is short for EXpired :D

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*Anger is our natural defense against pain. So when I say I hate you, it really means 'You hurt me.'

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‎*I wish I could go back to the day I met you and just walk away. Because honestly, it would've saved me so much hurt and pain..

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‎*If you want a strong relationship , you should start by keeping it to you & your boyfriend/girlfriend. Broadcasting won't do anything but give the "hoes" something to do.

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‎*When you truly care for someone, you don’t look for faults.
You don’t look for answers, you don’t look for mistakes.
You accept the faults and you overlook the excuses.

The measure of Love is when you Love without measure.
There are rare chances that you’ll meet
the person you love and who loves you in return.
So once you have it, don’t ever let go.
The chance may never come your way again.
In that way Love will take you together.

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‎*When you're single, people ask about gf/bf. When you have one, they ask is there any future? When u have a fiance, they ask about wedding? When u get married, they ask when will u have a baby? When u already have one, they ask when is little brother or sister coming? When u get... divorced, they ask why? If u moved on, they ask why so quickly? People will never stop asking..If you're proud of who u are and u don't care about what people think about you, LIKE it, because it's YOUR LIFE and YOU alone should decide how to LIVE IT.

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PINOY PICK UP LINES

Boy: Kisami Ka Ba?

Girl: Bakit

Boy: Kasi kaw Palagi Makita Ko sa Pagtulog Ko ehh...

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Boy: Electrifan ka ba?

Girl: Bakit?

Boy: Ng ikot ikot ka kasi palagi saking isipan eh....

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Boy: Diodorant ka bah?




Girl: Bakit?




Boy:  Kasi hindi ako mapakali kung wala ka...


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Boy: Baka magulat ka pag pina x-ray mo ang utak ko..

Girl: Bakit?

Boy: kasi poro picture mo ang laman ng utak ko...

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Boy: Gayuma Ka bah?

Girl: Bakit?

Boy: Kasi ang Square root ng 36 ay 6...

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Boy: Pinto,an ka bah?

Girl: Bakit?

Boy: Kasi Hindi ako makapasok ng wala ka eh..

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Boy: Crayola ka bah?

Girl: Bakit?

Boy: kasi binigyan mu ng kulay ang mundu ko....

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Boy: Ang happiness hindi ngsisimula sa letter H...

Girl: Bakit?

Boy: kasi ngsisimuka xa sa letter U........

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Boy: Araw ka bah?

Girl: Bakit?

Boy:Ang HOT mu kasi eh..


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